Memories

Six weeks ago today, my best friend died very suddenly.

We had not talked on the phone in months, possibly as long as a year. We’d texted, but that’s never the same. I used to think that I’d call her on the weekend, and then the weekend would come, I’d get busy, and suddenly it was Monday and I never called.

She had been my best friend since we were about 13 years old. There was a 3rd friend to round out our little trio, but we’d long since lost touch with her. D and I always stayed in touch, no matter how far apart we were living. We grew up together in Los Angeles, but life took me to New Orleans from many years, and eventually ending up on the East Coast.

She was that friend that I could call anytime things went sideways. We’d had many late night calls, filled with tears, some happy, some sad, as we supported each other in the ways only those sister-friends can. She was that “ride or die” friend. We had many adventures over the years. When I lived in Nola, she’d frequently visit during the summer when she was off work.

One year a local old theater, Saenger Theater for any locals, played old movies. I’d gotten tickets for us so we could go, we watched “Rear Window” and another movie I can’t recall at the moment. We loved it.

On another trip, we were home one rainy afternoon and made a pitcher of margaritas. I had been talking about a couple of home renovation projects that I’d been planning for that fall. After a couple of those margaritas, D talked me into ripping all of the carpet out of the bedrooms, “…to get a jumpstart on redoing the floor!” And after those margaritas, it did seem like a great idea…until we’d actually ripped it out and realized how bad a shape the hardwood was underneath. We laughed as I made phone calls to suddenly start that project sooner than later.

We hadn’t seen each other in person in over 10 years. Life just took a lot of unexpected turns for both of us. I flew out for her wedding in 2008; I never dreamed that would be the last time I saw her in person.

I miss her everyday. I have thought of a thousand things that I should text her, only to remember she’s gone.

Always make the phone call. Write the email. Type out the text. Take the time to connect with your loved ones, before the time is gone.

D loved roses. I’ll never see a rose and not think of her.

In some parts of the world, today is Mardi Gras. Elsewhere, like here in New Hampshire, it’s just Tuesday.

I miss Mardi Gras. Today is technically the day you say, “Happy Mardi Gras!” The season actually starts on January 6th and builds up to Mardi Gras Day. The season is referred to as Carnival. When I live in New Orleans, I celebrated Mardi Gras every year. It’s just what you do in New Orleans. I always enjoyed the parades and floats.

One of my favorite parades is a small walking parade, St. Anne’s parade. It starts down in Bywater, just a few doors down from the house I owned for a few years. My then husband and I would dress up and join the other Mardi Gras revelers in a slow stroll towards the French Quarter. More people joined the parade as it went along through the neighborhoods. By the time it got to the end of The Faubourg Marigny, it was pretty large. There were lots of people in costumes, some elaborate and involved lots of material. Others involved nothing more than a lot of body paint. Carnival and Mardi Gras Day is about the only time of year you will probably not get arrested for public nudity…at least women won’t. And in some parts of town, the men either. It was prime people watching. This parade was mostly locals. It started around 9 or 10am and a lot of the group were already deep in their cups by then…some likely never stopping from the previous night. There was lots of musicians, sometimes not always playing the same tune, but always having fun.

There are many things I miss about New Orleans during Mardi Gras. King Cake! Yes, I could order one, but it’s not the same as being there. Besides, what would I do with an entire king cake?! And Popeye’s! This is the one time of year I would eat Popeye’s and not care about the calories. I miss weird things too. Walking home from the French Quarter back to campus in college because the street cars didn’t run all the way to the FQ during Carnival. A group of us would stumble down the neutral ground on St. Charles Ave back to campus. Sidewalk side…Neutral Ground side. Go cups; although this is a year-round thing, not a Mardi Gras thing.

I don’t have many pictures from the years of Mardi Gras I attended. We never took cameras with us and those were the days before cell phone cameras. Or good cell phone cameras. The little flip phones of the early 00’s didn’t have quality cameras. All of my pictures are in my head instead of committed to digital memory.

This year Mardi Gras and all of the parades were canceled back in November or some such. Since we are still living in a pandemic, it was a smart decision, in my opinion. New Orleanians were creative in how they’ve chosen to celebrate this year. The parades may have been cancelled, but celebrating such an important season in Nola culture is not cancelled! Many friends have posted pictures on Facebook and Insta this year of the house float decorations. People either DIY’d their own decorations to turn their homes/yards/porches into Mardi Gras floats or they hired local artists that usually create and build elaborate floats for the Mardi Gras krews. I’ve loved seeing them and I personally am hoping it becomes a new part of the culture to celebrate the Carnival season.

Happy Mardi, y’all!

Goddess Musings

Witch. Photographer. Writer. Runner. Dreamer.

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Always Find the Time

Happy Mardi Gras!